Some of us just amble through life without any particular objective, not knowing what we want or where we want to be. Is it any wonder that we may feel let down?
I think that I have been lucky in that I have always been very focussed on getting what I want in life. Although there have been times when I have been in a really difficult emotional situation and overwhelmed with the pain of what has been happening to me. At those times it has felt like ‘there is no way out of here’, or ‘I don’t know which way to go’. Interestingly, since I have specialized in pre-natal trauma resolution, I have discovered that these two statements are typical psychological states arising out of an intial traumatic event in the brith process. The first statement tends to be linked with stage one of birth, when the cervix has not opened and yet the mother’s contractions are strong and the baby may feel as if he or she is about to die because there is no way forward. The second statement can be linked to stage two of birth, when the baby’s head has come through the cervix and finally the baby has a sense of relief and release, only to be suddenly obstructed by the hard bones of the mother’s pelvis. The only way through is to turn her or his head, but in a often terrifying, life and death situation, it can be a hard choice to make.
Once we have these traumas imprinted in our nervous systems, they can get triggered time and time again by events that mimic the feel of the original situation. This is why it is even more important to understand these dynamics, and to know yourself and your reactions. You can then be forewarned and prepared with a method of dealing with it.
Whether we are talking about self healing, or developing wealth and abundance in life, a focussed goal is a critical part of the equation. We would not undertake a journey without a map, or a distination, not unless we wanted to wander endlessly in the wilderness. For some this is ok, but not for me. Buddha says that unless we commit to our enlightment, holding it as our destination, then we are destined to be reborn countless times. When people in difficult emotional situations come to me for healing, I often ask them to visualize how their goal would look. I then ask them, how would it sound and how would it feel. This engages all parts of the brain, and begins to make the desired destination, more of an embodied experience.
You can do the same for yourself. If you truly want your life to go somewhere, then begin to plan your goal. See it, feel it, taste, hear it. Write about it, draw it, describe it verbally in all it’s details. It’s not necessary to know how you are going to get there. That will come later once you have embarked upon the journey. You need only to know the goal or destination and then decide to take the first step.
If you are a therapist and you would like to be better prepared to work with your clients when they have trauma, you may be interested to come to this workshop:
Healing Trauma – Without Tears
11th February 2011 – Healing Waters Sanctuary
Juliet – Mantrika Sacred Dawn